Life

So been awhile since I update. Probably because until a couple days ago nothing really was going on out of the ordinary. And that was really more like T. and I had a huge fight in the middle of the night that morphed into a long talk that has lead to me doing a lot of thinking over the last couple of days. Basically what it boils down to is we're probably going to break up. Parts of our relationship are fine, but others have crumbled to nothing. I love him, but maybe not in the right way any more. He's out of town until tomorrow evening, I've got Monday off so I'm going to have to make myself talk to him. I know he doesn't want to break up, but I don't know if there is enough left, on my side at least, to be worth trying to save.

It's difficult where we live together and he runs my business. It's not like the store does well enough that I could actually pay him either. I know he's said in the past that if we broke up he'd still run the store, but that doesn't make it any easier. Because I do worry, like will we be able to still live together? It is a 2 bedroom apartment. And if not where will be live? How will he be able to afford it? Will I be able to afford this place on my own? Well the rent would probably drop that would help some. It just sucks. Because I do care about him still. We've know each other since we were 12 or 13, and even if I can't be his girlfriend anymore I'm always going to be his friend, and for awhile at least his business partner.

Ugh. Being adult sucks.